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Brilliant Mathematician Finally Cracks Tucson’s Traffic Light Code
Brilliant Scientist Solves Tucson Traffic Light Crisis TUCSON- Wilhelm Heinrich Fraktalbach is being dubbed Tucson's own Oppenheimer due...
News
Children/Parents Mortified As Tucson Mall Utilizes New “Tesla AI Santa Bot” To Undercut Costs
Tucson Mall's new Tesla Optimus Santa AI Robot TUCSON- Every December brings along cultural traditions throughout the US for families...
My Wife Decided Not To Finance With Jim Click & Now Evil, Wacky Inflatable Tube Men Are Following Us
I won't give my real name, but you can call me Jack. A while back, my wife went to Jim Click to look at a Certified Pre-Owned Hyundai...
Tucson Ghosts Are Beginning To Ask For Tips
TUCSON- With "Spooky Season" here, locals and tourists alike have been getting a head start on visiting Tucson's best haunted hotspots...
The “Bertos” Mexican Drive-Thru Clans Decide To Finally Unite Under One Banner
TUCSON- "One Bertos to rule them all, One Bertos to find them, One Bertos to bring them all, and in the desert bind them" reads an...
Affluent Tucson Family Devastated That Only Son Went To A Circle K Instead Of A Quiktrip
TUCSON, AZ- A local couple has expressed their outrage and disappointment after their son, William, made the grave mistake of stopping at...
Golf N' Stuff Unveils "Gay Zoltar" In Suspected Cash Grab For Pride Month
TUCSON- Golf N' Stuff, the long-standing, iconic miniature golf and arcade staple has introduced an updated "Gay" version of Zoltar, the...
City of Tucson Demolishes Yoga Studio For Refusal To Use Mandated 'Papyrus' Font
City of Tucson Demolishes Yoga Studio For Refusal To Use 'Papyrus' Font
Sad Cowboy Goes on Dance-Strike Until “Yellowstone” Comes Back On The T.V.
TUCSON- Raylon Carver has hung up his hat and put away his dancing boots...for now that is. The long-standing "The Maverick: King of...
A Little Too Excited For Season: Wildcats Football Fan Actually Tries To Takes Bear Down
TUCSON- Brian Murry, a local bartender, was last reported seen by hikers 3 days ago on the Mt. Lemmon Peppersauce Canyon Trail after a...
Tucson Radio DJ Frustrated That Summer UFO Tour Includes Phoenix But Not Tucson
TUCSON- There has been a growing dissatisfaction from locals about Tucson's post-pandemic entertainment roster due largely in fact to...
Indonesian Knife Fighter Very Upset Learning “Tucson Knife Fight” Is Actually Culinary Competion
TUCSON- Arjuna "BladeWhisper" Wiratama, a West Sumatra, Indonesia native and silat Minangkabau legend, has been staying with a cousin in...
Cobra Arcade Begins Using Actual Cobras To Help Security Close On Weekends
TUCSON, AZ - Cobra Arcade is a downtown party staple on the weekends and they are no strangers to the struggles of closing the bar in a...
Reid Park Zoo's Newest Exhibit Is Your Mom
TUSCON, AZ - Taxpayers are already complaining about rising cost of feed required for the exhibit. Good day to you.
Tucson Man Denied Entrance Into Every NYC Bar Because ID Expires In 2063
NEW YORK- 25 year old Tucson native, Jacob Howell, was excited to visit New York City for the first time ever…until he realized he was...
UofA Student's Uncle Knows About A Mexican Tire Shop Where He Can "Get 'Em For Cheap"
TUCSON, AZ- UofA student Brett Irvington finally decided to check the tire treads on his truck Thursday morning because of a TikTok video...
Woman Finally Satisfied After Tucson Potholes Provide Multiple Orgasms
TUCSON, AZ- Jennifer Lin was near 29th and Craycroft when she came to a very curious conclusion. She just climaxed. "I was driving after...
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